Day 158: Much Mush

Day 158: Much Mush

The exhaustion level is high, ladies and gents.

B-but, you just had a day off, you might sputter back at that statement. And, I’d answer you honestly: yup. Not sure why I feel so tired right now 😛

I didn’t, strictly speaking, take a day off today…in the sense that I pretty much ran various errands (with little food in me belly) all day, until 7:00 when I was finally going to sit down and take a load off, watch my team beat stupid Seattle. That didn’t happen, the baseball watching. The game was rained out…which is a minor miracle, actually, considering that there was no rain up in the Bay Area tonight. It’s a whole blog post unto itself on the good ol’ greencollarbaseball…but suffice it to say that someone fucked up, the infield got rained on last night and it never had time to dry. It was like a dirt slushie. I saw close up camera shots of them walking through it. It looked exactly like those delicious foamy semi-solid semi-liquid drinks from ye neighborhood 7-11, only dirt colored. I honestly have never seen anything like it. I don’t think anyone else has, either, because everyone seemed pretty shell-shocked from the whole ordeal.

Anyway, I *did* do my two hours of writing today…it was more of a struggle today. I came up a sketch of the rest of the outline, but it was nowhere NEAR as detailed from about Act 2 onward, which didn’t make me happy. In fact, I felt pretty discouraged in the last half hour or so of the two hour writing sesh…just not liking what I had before, and pounding my head against the wall trying to come up with something better. Now, with a little distance, I realize it’s just coming up against the reality that there are still many, many holes to fill in before it will be a complete product. And, that’s okay. I just need to keep pounding it out. Throw stuff away I don’t like, come up with something new.

Coops was being especially cute. When I first went into the bedroom to sit down and write, I could hear him in the living room, sniffing around for edibles. I called out to him in a disapproving, stop it kind of fatherly voice, and he trotted right into the bedroom, jumped up on the bed, and immediately curled up at the bottom of my feet. He stayed there the whole time I was writing. Such a good fucking dog. Jesus. We really lucked out with this fur ball.

I just yawned really big and really long. I am legitly exhausted. But, I did my grocery shopping, and ran the other little errands (like FINALLY picking up skin care stuff for my face, a goal I put out on this blog TWO MONTHS ago…better late than never)…so tomorrow, mark my words, I will be lazy as FUCK. Jabba the Hut lazy. Ya, I went there. Sleeping in. A nap…maybe TWO…and then to bed early. The kind of day I actually need to not be so tired starting off my next three-day work binge.

I tell you, writing about my life every day definitely puts into perspective what I spend most of my time thinking about. It’s definitely not ALL I think about, this work stuff, but it’s definitely what’s on my mind at the end of the day; what I feel like I need to get off my chest and load up in my brain for the next day. I do have other thoughts…like watching an episode of Cosmos, and thinking about those early scientists, how incredible the work they did really was, given the tiny community of like-minded people there was at the time. Very brave, actually, and incredibly inventive and ingenious. Or…man, I swear to god I had another example of random, interesting thoughts…and it’s completely gone now.

The brain; it is mush. It’s time to sleepy sleeps. G’night young squires. And old squires! G’Night to you too! I shall see ye bitches tomorrow.