Day 637: A rise

Day 637: A rise

So, apparently I love Dean Ellis. Another one of his tonight.

I never like it when someone is able to get a rise out of me. Get me upset, or frustrated, with the heart beating faster. Don’t like it. It hardly ever happens, to be honest, except with apartment building stuff. That’s been true from day one. That’d be an interesting delve into the psyche, why it is that this job is so different from really any other that I’ve ever had in that I feel like I can’t just speak my mind and be myself…that’s really what it is, I suppose. In every other job I’ve ever had, if someone was being an ass to me, I could say whatever I wanted to them and be done with it. Not so with managing an apartment building. I have to be much more careful, I feel like I’m much more guarded, and because of that, much more cornered and inauthentic in many situations.

Something like that happened today. I can’t talk about it other than that, it just got a rise out of me, and I always feel like a fool afterwards. Shameful about being inarticulate during the incident, and objective…two things I feel much more effective at in almost any other situation. The ground is constantly shifting underneath you as an apartment manager…at least in my company. I never know consistently where I stand, and that just puts me on edge in any sort of tense situation…I never know what I’m going to be on the hook for.

That said…the incident itself was over something very minor. It shouldn’t have been a big deal, and it wasn’t really in the end. Hopefully it’s calmed down and forgot by sun-up tomorrow, and I think it will be. I was able to move on and re-focus on work very shortly after, and I finished a full-day’s goal. It was about 45 minutes later than I had hoped I’d finish, but I still finished. And early enough to help the Ho with an audition scene and hang out together for a bit and watch more True Detective. That show…

Finished season 6 of Deep Space Nine today while working. You really, REALLY love that cast by the time you get into that season…especially at the end. They’re just such good people, such kind wonderful characters they created on that series. They support each other so much…and they had them bicker more amongst each other by then, after the influence of Gene had waned enough for some really good writers to decide that Trek’s ideals would survive even if our heroes were a little less idealized and perfectly evolved. More…well, human. And they are in DS9, which makes how they always come back together for each other that much more poignant and heartfelt.

I’ll be done with DS9 in another week or two at the pace I’m at, and I’ll once again be sad to see it “go.” But, more adventures await with Voyager…and then Enterprise…and then? I don’t know. I’ll have to figure out something else to put on in the background while I work for a while. But…I will always remember 2015 as they year I watched every single episode of Star Trek ever made. It’s quite an accomplishment. Maybe I’ll try Babylon 5 again…I wasn’t a huge fan of that to be completely honest the first time around…but I have a dear friend who swears by it, so I feel like I should give it another chance. We’ll see.

That’s it for tonight. It was a solid day today, “rise” and all. I got my shit done, and that’s the goal on a work day. See y’all tomorrow! 🙂